How It Used to Be to Feel Homeless
Once you have been homeless for awhile, you need and want people to need you, but how, when you feel your not worth it. You want and need someone to reach out and care about you. Yes, I need food and a place to live, but there is a need whether myself for love from anybody. I know if just one person showed me that I did matter and that I had a purpose in life, it would give me the boost that I need to try again. The problem is that far too may people do not even see homeless people. They just pass them by. I know when I was homeless that I couldn’t grab any and yell, “Hey, I’m human. I need help!”
So what could I do to let people know how I was hurting? I stated to pray and asked God to let somebody see me, to let somebody love me. This is when I went into a shelter. Here, I knew what we all needed was for someone to care. It would have made all the difference in the world. There are a lot of things in life that we can do without and not suffer.
However, to be unwanted and un-involved tears down human beings until they cannot find their way in the world and become fearful of being rejected. For most homeless people there is help, if they want it. For me to understand my homelessness was difficult, because I soon learned that once you lose your sense of worth, it is almost impossible to get it back. Once you live in darkness, it is hard to see the light.
Copyright Homeless Grapevine Summer 1993 Issue 2 Cleveland, Ohio.