No Sympathy for the Struggles of the Single Person

By: Kim “Supermutt” Goodman

Many charitable organizations are quicker to help families than a single person. A “family” is defined as at least one adult with a minor child under the age of 18. Many people feel pity for the poor child who is forced to live without certain material things. Most people don’t feel pity for the single person because they feel that all they have to worry about is themselves. People often feel a single person is free to go to school without distractions or work any job with any hours and if one job is not enough go out and get a second one because it’s not like they have kids to rush home to. Life is not that simple for all single people.

Many single people came from abusive or neglectful homes. Some single people were in the foster care system and aged out at 18. Instead of having normal unrealistic kids’ dreams such as being a princess or a superhero that later turn into more realistic dreams such as being a nurse or a teacher, these kids often have dreams of being loved by their parents or by a family. By their young adult years many abused, neglected and foster care system kids grow up to be homeless young adults because they don’t have parents or family to turn to.

Many poor and homeless young adults try to go to college but get discouraged because they feel inferior to their classmates who came from caring and supportive families or get frustrated from the stress of dealing with the world alone. Many times it is hard for the homeless person to focus due to a lack of sleep. Some single people who were abused and neglected find it hard to sell themselves to an employer to get the job. It is hard for a person to tell someone how great they are if they feel that they are a bad person who is not worth loving. All the person knows is they need a job so they can take care of themselves.

Once a person gets a job their next step is to get a place to live. When the person gets an apartment they usually sign a one year lease, but if they lose their job they often get behind on their rent. Many times, they end up being evicted and back on the street. Some people turn to payday loans and end up getting a loan, repaying it and re-borrowing it but when the job is gone the loan usually ends up being a huge debt. As time goes on the single person often accumulates a bunch of debts because they have to take financial risks in order to survive.  Single people have no one to turn to for help or support. Then when they get another job they often end up dealing with having their wages garnished.

After so long the single person may experience frustration because of their struggles, anger for not having supportive parents and family and many times give up because they don’t have anyone to encourage them or keep them motivated. The single person has no one and is often left to wonder what is wrong with them and why they can’t get ahead. Some people also deal better with the emotional pain of their past. Many times after not getting the jobs they want or need, after getting fired too many times, after so many evictions, after so much debt, after so many garnishments and bill collector calls, after so many broken dreams and hearing over and over that they need to do better in life many single people do what they think they need to do in order to survive. Some single people do illegal things, use people to get their needs met or turn to alcohol or drugs for comfort because they have no one to comfort their pain.

While single people are trying hard to survive and do the right thing there is limited help available for them. Once a single person has a nervous breakdown from their stress or develops a mental illness such as depression or PTSD then they become eligible for disability benefits. Once a single person develop an addiction problem then they can enter a rehab program and get help with employment and housing and even get access to support groups to build a relationship with others. When a single person gets in trouble with the law, while in prison they can get their G.E.D. and learn a trade and many times get encouragement from other inmates and sometimes get help with employment and housing after being released.

It seems as if a parent can get help with employment, housing, clothing, furniture, rent and utilities just because they have a child but the single person can’t seem to get a lot of help until all of their dreams are broken or after their lives are screwed up.  

 Copyright Cleveland Street Chronicle

 May 2014 Cleveland, Ohio